It was my birthday yesterday. 20 years old! As I lay in bed that morning, I thought to myself that my life is basically 1/4 to 1/5 over. I remember thinking, "What have I accomplished in a quarter of a lifetime?"
As I pondered, I couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. I remember that before the mission, I was really proud of some pretty inconsequential things. My car. My test scores. The people I knew.
I started thinking about how someone feels as they are lying on their deathbed. What kind of things are they proud of, or not proud of? What kind of things should I be proud of?
I decided the following. At the end of our life, we should be proud of how well we developed ourselves and our personalities and talents, as human beings and children of God. And then we should be proud of how we used our abilities to help other people develop themselves.
When we die, we will have ourself. We will only have OUR knowledge, wisdom, personality, and character traits. If you die an impatient and bitter person, you will be resurrected as a bitter and impatient person. Likewise, if you use this life to its fullest potential, and develop patience, love, kindness, integrity, and every other admirable trait, then you can consider your life a success. Something to be proud of.
Shoot. I got pretty introspective there.
I guess it all sounds like a really good idea, but the hard part is putting it into practice.
Love you. Have a good week!
-Elder Crotzer
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